Eternal Serenade
by Hexe
Summary: Sara is being haunted by dreams from her past
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Characters off CSI belong to whoever it is owns them. Not to me.   
  
CHAPTER 1  
  
"Sara" Catherine Willows said into her workmates ear, "Wake up, we've got a case"   
  
"What?" Sara said drowsily. "Go 'way, I wanna sleep"   
  
"Sara, get up!" Catherine repeated, putting more force behind the words "We've got a murder that needs solving. Sleep when you're not on duty."   
  
Sara just groaned and slumped further down in her chair.   
  
Catherine glared at her friend, hands on hips. She didn't know what was wrong with Sara. It just wasn't like her to be slow to respond to a case. Or to be sleeping heavily while she was supposed to be working. Drowsing after pulling a double shift, yeah, but full on sleeping when they'd only been on a couple of hours? It just didn't seem like Sara.   
  
She sighed. There was only one thing for it. Sara was not going to be happy about it, but they needed to get to the scene.   
  
"Sara, if you don't wake up now I am going to pour a cup of cold water over your head" she said threateningly. If the mere threat didn't get Sara moving, carrying it out sure would.   
  
There was no response from the slumped over Sara. Catherine shook her head, and went to fill a cup up at the sink. Bringing it over, she held it poised above Sara's head. "Last chance," she said warningly. When that provoked no response she rolled her eyes and upended the cup.   
  
Sara's head shot up and she started spluttering through her hair, which had been plastered to her face by the water. "What'd you do that for?" she demanded, shooting Catherine an evil glare.   
  
"Sorry Sar, I did warn you. About three times" Catherine told her, trying not to laugh at the indignant look on Sara's face. "Get up, we've get to get to the scene."   
  
Sara groaned. "Sorry Cath, I'm just so tired" she explained. "For some reason I haven't been able to sleep well the last few nights. I think the cases are catching up to me. Whenever I try to sleep I see the bodies. It's giving me the heebie-jeebies"   
  
Catherine sent her a sympathetic look. So that was it. All the death they dealt with, it had to catch up to you sometimes. Each CSI had experienced what Sara was going through many times. Catherine herself couldn't count the nights she hadn't been able to sleep, thinking about a case she had just solved.   
  
"It happens to everyone Sara" Catherine told her. "You need a way to vent, like a hobby or something. That's my personal opinion on why Gris likes bugs so much. They take his mind off it."   
  
"So, what, you think I need to take up staring at bugs?" Sara asked. "Thanks Cath, but I'll pass."   
  
Catherine laughed. "No, bugs aren't really something I can imagine you being that interested in" she agreed. "How about something like um..." she stopped, stumped. She could not think of one single thing that she could imagine Sara Sidle doing as a hobby. She just didn't seem the hobby type.   
  
"Hey, what do you do?" Sara asked curiously, "You seem to know what you're talking about here, so I figure you must have a way to vent?"   
  
Catherine blushed. "Yeah, you know what I did before I became a CSI. Right?" she asked.   
  
A look of realisation came over Sara's face. "Oh. Oh!" she said, "You mean you... um, pole dance?"  
  
Catherine nodded. "Yep, I teach classes at the weekend" she paused a moment, an idea formulating. It would be totally out of character for Sara, but, "You could come one time if you wanted."   
  
Sara looked taken aback. Then she grinned. "Maybe I will," she said. "But, didn't you say something about a case? Fill me in?"   
  
"Okay, we have a single DB, male, and that's about all I know," Catherine told her. "Oh, and we probably also have a rather irate Grissom waiting for us, the time we're taking."  
  
She wasn't wrong. There was a very displeased looking Grissom waiting at the scene for them. "Where've you been?" he asked. "I paged you half an hour ago. The lab's only 10 minutes away."   
  
"Sorry Gil" Sara said. "I was sleeping, Catherine had to wake me up."   
  
Grissom sent her a very strange look. He had just noticed something. Unless his eyes were deceiving him, Catherine was trying not to laugh at something, and Sara's hair was sticking out in all directions. He suspected that the latter might be the cause of the former.   
  
"Sara. What is wrong with your hair?" he asked.   
  
Sara bent down to look in the mirror of the Tahoe. "Oh, my God, Cath, why didn't you tell me?" Her hair looked terrible. Resting her head on the table had given her bed -technically table, but still- hair, and the addition of the water had caused her waves to turn into frizz.   
  
She turned to glare at Catherine. "Someone dumped a cup of water on my head" she said, scowling.   
  
"She wouldn't wake up. And we needed to get here!" Catherine defended herself.   
  
Grissom rolled his eyes. Okay, the two females on his team were acting a little childishly for some reason. Whatever. "Just get on with processing," he told them.  
  
Catherine systematically searched the scene, looking for anything to process. But at the same time she was thinking about Sara's response to her suggestion. It certainly hadn't been what she had been expecting. Namely shock. And then refusal. Whether Sara would go through on her 'maybe' was another thing to see.   
  
It sure would be interesting if she decided to though. Catherine smiled just at the thought of it. Yep, that would be a sight to see.   
  
Authors note: Okay, strange things happening here. Not going at all where I was wanting it to. The characters have plans of their own, as usual. Anyway, I will update this if I get at least 5 reviews. Otherwise, you'll have to hope I'm feeling generous. 


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Characters belong to whoever it is owns CSI, not to be. I'm just borrowing them.   
  
Authors note: Cool. People like this. I said I'd update when I got at least 5 reviews, so here I am updating. Sorry it wasn't sooner, I've been busy.   
  
Two weeks later: Okay, still haven't finished this chapter, sorry! I was dragged to the beach by my parents. That might sound kinda weird, but I was without computer, let alone internet connection. It's practically torture for me!   
  
Oh, and to the person who said they'd been doing a similar story with Lockwood as the main, you've given me very scary images in my mind, of Lockwood trying to pole-dance :)   
  
CHAPTER 2  
  
Sara jolted upright, choking down a scream. The nightmares were there again, and worse than ever. At this rate she was going to be falling asleep on shift again. And that was not a good thing, as Catherine was keeping a pretty close eye on her, and kept asking if she was all right. She wasn't, but she kept assuring Catherine that she was fine. It was easier that way.   
  
She had managed to sleep okay the past few nights, mainly because she was so exhausted that the dreams didn't come. Unfortunately, she had caught up on enough sleep for that option to go away. So, although she had fallen into bed this morning, it was only 3 hours later, and she doubted she was going to get to sleep again. She couldn't close her eyes for fear of seeing their faces.   
  
Even now, wide-awake, flashes of them kept popping into her mind. Maybe Catherine was right. Maybe she did need something to get her mind off the job. At this point she was prepared to try anything. Even Catherine's suggestion. She just couldn't imagine herself pole- dancing, but then again, before she had been told, she had never guessed what it was that Catherine had done before joining CSI. She hadn't picked Catherine to be the sort to pole- dance, yet that was how her friend had made a living.  
  
Sara couldn't think of any reason why she shouldn't give it a try. It was a hobby, and it had the added bonus that it would be a friend teaching, not a total stranger. It wasn't something she had to do forever after all, just until these nightmares stopped. And if she didn't like it, she could always try something else. And if she did like it, who knew what would come of it? It couldn't do any harm.   
  
She nodded to herself. She would give it a go. She'd tell Catherine tonight. That would be fun. Catherine surely hadn't truly expected her to take up the offer. The look on her face would probably be priceless. Doing this would be worth it, just to see that look.   
  
Sara groaned. She was so tired, yet even the thought of closing her eyes terrified her. She just couldn't face seeing the victims of her cases. So many victims, so many faces. Why were they haunting her? She had never had this problem before, not in the years she had been a CSI.   
  
It had begun after the lab explosion, and then they had worsened after the unexpected death of Detective Lockwood. That much she knew. Perhaps it had been the position of seeing Greg in the hospital afterwards, and the fact that it had been someone she knew who now lay dead. Each victim was bad, but to know that someone you knew would never again be there, that was frightening. She could feel to some degree what the victim's family must go through, all that pain. She could hardly bear it.   
  
But she knew that it could not affect her job, which she loved, and had loved ever since she had first taken it. Part of the job, and a part she found very important, was giving the victim's families closure, telling them who had taken their loved ones away from them. For her to stop wanting to do that, just because of these nightmares, would be a personal horror. The victims would haunt her even more, faceless though they would be. She would know that she could be out helping solve these crimes. To be able to, but not be doing it, that would weigh on her, hurt her more than these phantoms possibly could.   
  
Sara wondered at these thoughts that were going through her head. They were things that had never occurred to her before, or at least, not consciously. However, her subconscious did seem to be showing itself rather a lot recently. What was one more thing?   
  
She sighed. Lying here thinking about it wasn't accomplishing anything. Since she couldn't sleep, she may as well get up and try to find something to use up the time until tonight. Maybe if it was something tiring enough, she would just knock herself out. If that didn't work, she was seriously considering drugs. Anything to help her sleep.   
  
She rolled out of bed and wandered into her living room. There wasn't really anything for her to do. She'd tried cleaning the last time the nightmares had woken her up so early. She really hadn't done anything to undo that work, so nothing new for tonight. Damn. Cleaning had been her first thought. Boring, but energetic. Easy way to get to sleep, and you had the choice of two options: boredom or exhaustion.   
  
Sara looked around. What was there that she could do? All that was in here was her old family photos, and a few more recent ones of her and her co-workers, when they weren't working. Well, it was either that, or watch TV, and she knew from experience, there was nothing good on at this time. Most of the population was at work, asleep, or taking part in one of the many pass times people came to Las Vegas for. So it was filler television for all those who weren't.   
  
She decided on the photos. Maybe the good memories that were portrayed in them could help wipe out her nightmares. Replace them in her mind. Doubtful, but it was worth a try, and there was nothing else to do. She couldn't even see if anyone needed help at the lab, or not for hours anyway. Ecklie would go crazy if one of the Graveyard shift workers turned up while he was there. He'd say she was meddling or something of the sort.   
  
She picked an album at random and settled down on the couch. Anything was worth a try to get rid of these nightmares. Even pole-dancing.   
  
Authors note: Okay, I finally finished this chapter. I hope you enjoy it. This time, I'm not going to update until I have at least fifteen reviews. More would be nice, and as I'm working on several stories, I'm more or less operating on a more reviews, quicker update policy at the moment. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: **All characters belong to Anthony E. Zuicker, etc, and certainly not to me

**Author's note **Well, I felt an urge to actually work on this story again, so here's chapter three, after what, a seven month wait? Sorry about that, but I haven't been writing much fanfiction at all recently, because I've had a complete block on all my current fics and no decent ideas for any new ones to start.

**Part II:** Well, I wrote THAT part of the note about 3 months ago ; Oh well, I got to finishing this chapter eventually.

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CHAPTER 3 

Sara steeled herself and strode into the break room, determined to get what she had to say out before she lost her nerve. She had been trying to psych herself up the entire shift, and it really wasn't working very well. So, she was going to tell Catherine _no_w that she was going to give the classes a try. If she waited until she was really ready, she was never going to do it.

"I've decided to give it a go," she blurted.

Catherine looked up from her cup of coffee and stared at her colleague in puzzlement. "Er…that's nice to know Sara," she said, blinking, "Now, what exactly is it you've decided to give a go?"

Catherine was incredibly confused. It wasn't often that Sara sounded that nervous. Was she giving a relationship with someone a go? Oh, god! It was Grissom! It had to be! Why hadn't she read the signs right? She had thought that Gris and Sara were more or less happy with things the way they were, with friendship. It would appear she had been wrong!

"You know Sara, you really don't want to rush into this sort of relationship," she counselled. Catherine wasn't at all sure that Gil and Sara were right for each other, and with them being two of her friends; she didn't want to see them hurt if things turned bad.

Now it was Sara's turn to be confused. "What relationship?" she asked, "You know I'm single at the moment!"

"So, you _aren't _planning to ask Grissom out?" Catherine asked, in some relief.

"_What_? No!" Sara yelped. Where on Earth had Cath got _that_ idea? She and Grissom were just friends. Going out with him would be just plain weird!

"Oh…well, what were you talking about then?" Catherine asked, her confusion returning in full.

"Your pole-dancing lessons," Sara explained, "Remember, you invited me to give it a try."

"Right! I'd completely forgotten about that," Catherine said, rather sheepishly. Jumping to conclusions really wasn't the best of ideas. How many times had Grissom told her that? But why was Sara deciding she did want to give the lessons a go? She had claimed that the nightmares had cleared up, and that she was fine. Catherine hadn't been entirely sure that she believed her, but decided to give Sara the benefit of the doubt and drop the subject. For Sara to actually be considering pole- dancing, that made it seem like there was something seriously wrong going on.

"The nightmares are back, aren't they?" she asked in concern.

Sara shook her head. "No, they're not back. They never went away. But they're getting worse and worse."

"Oh, Sara," Catherine sighed, "Why didn't you come and talk to me, or one of the others? We've all been through it. We can try to help you out a little."

"I didn't want you guys to have to worry about me," Sara told her, "I know you've all got lives and problems of your own, without adding mine to the mix."

"Well, at least you're trying to do something about it now," Catherine replied, "But I wish you would have come to someone before now. Surely you can tell that these nightmares are having an adverse effect on your work? The longer you leave them, the worse they'll get!"

Sara was aware of all that. And hey, it was a large part of the reason why she was going to try out something that she'd never have considered before experiencing these nightmares. Sara Sidle, pole- dancer was a very scary thought. But these nightmares were just so much worse. She thought that she would try pretty much anything, if only they'd go away and let her get some sleep.

"God, Cath." She smiled, trying to lighten the room a little, "that last bit was pure Grissom! You channelling him or something?"

With impeccable timing as usual, Grissom chose that moment to walk into the break room in search of them. He blinked at them.

"Who's channelling me?" he asked, a little confused as to what on earth the females of his team could be talking about.

"Don't worry Gris," Sara told him. Sometimes his timing was a pain, but this time it had worked in her favour. He'd cut off Catherine in the middle of lecture mode. And presumably his presence meant that a case had come up for them to work. Not that that was a good thing, since it generally meant something bad had befallen someone. But she just didn't feel prepared for Catherine to be annoyed with her for not being open. It was hard to vocalise what these nightmares were like, even to someone who had probably experienced similar ones.

"Well, okay then," he said, still confused, "If we're not discussing anything important then let's get going. These cases aren't going to process themselves, people. How about we get at trying to lower the level of unsolved crime in this place a little."

He winked at Catherine, "Although, maybe we should start with whom other than us has been taking Greg's coffee. There was _none _of the good stuff left today. We have a thief among us!"

Sara smiled, "Or possibly he just finally figured out that we're all using his supply, and left an empty packet so that we don't think to go searching any place else because we think it's all gone!"

Grissom was definitely in a not-so-bad mood today, if he was joking with them. Maybe something good had happened to him. Well, good for him! He deserved some good times once in a while! He was a great boss, always there for any of them. And without his help, she would have broken down countless times.

Maybe she should talk with him about the problems of her nightmares as well, see if he agreed on Catherine's method of taking up a hobby. Although, somehow she doubted he would suggest what she was going to try!

It could certainly be an interesting conversation if she managed to work _that_ into it…

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Authors note: Well, short chapter again it is! But hey, any update has to be better than none, right? I'm on a fic-kick at the moment and I found this chap half-done so I thought I'd finish it. Please review if anyone thinks this story is worth me continuing, since I have so many going I need to choose some to concentrate on and I'm wavering between whether to include this one of that list or not. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Declaimer: **No matter how much I might wish I owned the characters or the show 'CSI: Crime Scene Investigation', I don't. I am borrowing the characters merely for the purpose of the story.

**Authors Note:** Well, I thought it was probably about time I tried to continue this story since it's one of the ones I still have ideas for. I have my own laptop now (okay, it's kinda old, but it works and it has word on it) so I don't have to depend on the amount of time my parents will let me use the home computer to type! So I should have more time to do fanfiction since it can now be totally separate from the time I have to use for schoolwork.

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**Chapter 4**

Grissom frowned at Sara in concern. She had been looking atypically unhappy and exhausted recently. Maybe she was working herself too hard again. But whatever is was, something just wasn't right. The shadows under her eyes were so dark that even if Sara had been one to wear heavy make-up they would have shown through. It couldn't be healthy. Maybe it was time he 'suggested' to her that she took some time off.

He nodded to himself. Yes, as soon as they headed back to the lab, he would take her aside for a little chat. Get to the bottom of what was wrong at least, and hopefully get her to take a few nights off. They could cope without her for that long, and he could always pull Greg into the field if they were really short-handed. But things were fairly quiet at the moment, so far as their line of work went. And it really looked as if Sara needed a break. In face, he couldn't remember the last time she _had_ taken time off.

As if she could read his thoughts, Sara chose that moment to come up to him. "We're about done here now," she told him, "Everything that can be collected has been. Just got to do one final sweep, then head back to the lab?"

He nodded at her, and she turned to go back to Nick, but he rested a hand on her shoulder to get her attention back.

"When we get back to the lab, I'd like to see you in my office, okay?"

She nodded at him in puzzlement, and he let her return to her job, while he gathered up everything and put it in the Tahoe for transporting back to the lab. .

Sara was a little concerned. What could Gris need to talk to her about that couldn't be done in front of the others? She hadn't been slacking, and she had been careful not to let how tired she was get in the way of her work. If anything, she had been being more meticulous that usual to compensate.

Nick noticed with some worry the look in Sara's eyes. What had Grissom just said to her?

"What's up?" he asked, trying to sound casual about it. Everyone on the team had noticed that Sara wasn't in top form, and with the dark shadows under her eyes, it wasn't hard to tell why. Surely Grissom hadn't pulled her up about it? He wasn't one to tell someone off for not getting enough sleep; he couldn't talk himself.

"Oh nothing. Gris just wants to talk with me at the lab," Sara told him, trying to sound nonchalant, "He said just final sweep, then we can head back and start trawling through everything."

Nick nodded and set back to their job, but he was a trifle disconcerted. Grissom barely ever had 'private talks' with them unless he felt they had screwed up and needed to find out what had happened. He hoped that Sara wasn't in any kind of trouble, but from what he had seen of her, she had been toeing the line even more than normal. She hadn't even picked on a dick of a male suspect they'd had a few days ago; the sort that usually provoked her temper more than anything he'd ever known. Perhaps Grissom was just going to mention the same worrying concern that was bothering them all; Sara was starting to look half dead these days. And no-one other than Catherine – who wasn't leaking them anything to work off – knew why. He knew from experience that there were a lot of things that CSI's could lose sleep over, but it seemed to be going to the extreme with Sara. But obviously, it wasn't something she felt like talking to him or Warrick about.

Sara looked around the scene, doing a final sweep for evidence that could have somehow been missed before heading out to the Tahoe a little reluctantly, detouring on the way to tell the widower that his house was his own again and that he could get cleaners in now if he so wished. The man nodded gratefully, retreating into his home and shutting the door firmly on the world outside.

Sara gazed after him with a sigh. They weren't even mid thirties, yet that couple had been torn apart by death, and although it may turn out that he had nothing to do with it, as the first on scene, he was automatically at the top of their 'persons of interest' list. Poor guy. Lost a wife and told that he was a suspect in it, in one day. She could barely imagine how that felt, though knew she would be when she managed to fall asleep. This one and many other cases, solved and unsolved. The victims, the perpetrator and everyone else involved, they all haunted her. Everything haunted her and each case she worked just made it worse. With luck, having something else to concentrate on would distract her from it, fill her mind with something other than their faces, glaring at her.

She silently swung herself into the backseat of the Tahoe, not even bothering to argue with the others over calling shotgun. It just wasn't worth it, and annoying Grissom about something like that, when he had already told her he wanted to talk, could not be a good idea. Grissom didn't often call anyone to his office to do anything other than report, but when he had to pull rank, he did it well. They all respected Gris, considered him a friend, but when he wanted to talk in private it either meant something good, or that you were about to be taken to task for something. And there weren't any promotions on offer at the moment, certainly not anything she would apply for. Which meant that Grissom was concerned about something and wanted it explained.

When they reached the lab, she stopped only long enough to help check in the evidence with the others before excusing herself, saying that she would be back soon. She trusted Nick to tell the others that Grissom wanted to talk to her. And she expected they were all going to be waiting for her return to find out what was wrong. But she just didn't _feel_ like sharing. It had taken a lot for her to even tell anything to Catherine. They guys; she just didn't think that they'd get it. The nightmares, yes. But not the whole thing. And there was no _way_ she was telling Nick or Warrick _anything_ about the pole-dancing classes! She'd _never _hear the last of it if she did! Or worse, they might try and tag along with her. Which would mean murder from Catherine, no doubt!

She raised her fist to knock on his office door, but it swung open before she could, and Grissom guided her inside.

"What's up?" she asked him, getting straight to the point.

He blinked at her, "Nothing's _up_, per say. I just needed to talk with you. You haven't been seeming yourself recently and I was wondering if it was anything that I could help you with. I don't like to see any of my team obviously having problems."

Obviously he didn't say it, but he especially didn't like to see Sara unhappy.

Sara sighed inwardly, but smiled at him, "I'm all right Gil, really. Cath's helping me with what's up. I just haven't been sleeping too well, okay? It's fine."

Grissom raised his eyebrows at her, "Really. The that's why you've been looking half dead for the past week? I don't think so, Sara. I want you to take some time off, have a break for a few nights." He raised a hand to cut off her objections, "That's _not_ an order, no. But it is a very strong suggestion, from a friend as well as your boss."

Sara sighed in defeat. She knew that look. He wasn't going to budge on this, and if she didn't comply he was going to pry and find out everything. It was just easier to let him have his way.

"Okay, fine," she said, trying not to sound snappish, "I'll take the rest of the week off. That good enough?"

He nodded at her, "Okay, you can go now. There's only an hour left of shift, and the others will be fine. I'll see you on Monday morning. I hope you're feeling better by then. Get some _rest_, for God's sake, Sara."

Sara all but stalked out of his office, rolling her eyes. She wasn't truly angry at him though. She just hated the feeling that she was doing less than her best and that people had _noticed_. She wanted to appear strong, not half dead.

Sighing, she swung by the locker-room to collect her stuff, then walked out to her car to drive home. She couldn't be bothered telling the others where she had gone. Grissom could tell them he'd sent her home if he wanted. She didn't care.

But at least she would have time to psych herself up for the pole-dancing lessons on Saturday night. Today being Wednesday, she had almost 3 days to convince herself that it was a good idea. Or of course, 3 days to chicken out. But hopefully her resolve would stick. Because by that point she would have probably been awake almost solidly for close to 72 hours. Since she doubted that this extra time was going to let her rest up any more. It would just give her more time to think, and that was the problem in the first place.

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**Authors Note:** r/r, please :o) It only takes you guys a couple minutes to tell me what you think, while it takes me a _lot _longer to write chapters. Any suggestions, criticism, etc either email me or post it in a review. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer:** Not mine. Wish they were, but they belong to Anthony E Zuicker and co. I'm merely borrowing them.

**Author's Note: **Well, I don't think anyone's reading this anymore, but never mind. I'll continue it for the moment anyway, since when I have ideas I'm always gonna try follow them through, since it doesn't happen that often.

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**Chapter 5**

Sara paced the room, paused at the front door with her hand on the knob, pulled her hand away as if it had been zapped, then went back over to her couch, plonked herself down and sighed. She had been following this pattern for 10 minutes, but every time she grasped the doorknob, assuring herself that everything would be fine, her mind was flooded with all the images of what could go wrong and she would retreat to the safety of the couch, before building up steam, pacing around the room a few times and then trying again. But have the exact same result as each previous attempt. It just wasn't working. And if she didn't leave soon, she was going to be late.

She rested her head on her hands, grinding the heel of her palms into her eyes. Having a few days off may have prevented any new faces from popping up in her nightmares, but ut hadn't lessened those featuring the cold, dead eyes that had already bored into her brain. The only way that she had been managing to get _any_ nightmare free sleep was drugs. But they made her slow and her brain even more sluggish than they made her body. Not only was that effect not worth it, but she wouldn't be able to use them while she was working anyway. She needed all her senses sharp for her job. And though they may have been dulled from lack of sleep – though caffeine was taking care of that somewhat – the drugs were much, much worse on her sharpness.

Sara was jolted out of her unsleeping dream-state by the shrill ringing of her doorbell. Frowning, she approached the door. She wasn't expecting anyone. She certainly wouldn't have organised anything for tonight when she knew she was going out. She stood behind the door, peering cautiously through the peephole. And was greeted by the sight of the familiar form of Catherine standing there, smiling merrily and waving a set of car-keys at her, obviously indicating that she was here to give Sara a lift. Groaning, Sara unlatched and opened the door. Catherine knew her too well. She had probably figured that Sara was going to chicken out and decided that wasn't on. This was her way of forcing Sara to try out her class.

"Surprised to see me?" Catherine grinned at her, "Knowing you, you've been cooped up in here since Wednesday. You're coming out now, whether you like it or not! It's not good for you to be inside all this time." Her grin softened and sobered to a concerned look, "You're still not getting much sleep, are you? You look a little better – the panda look's gone- but that about it. Maybe you should ask Gris for some more time off. He'd let you. We don't have too much to do, and he's worried about you," she paused, holding Sara's eyes with her own, "We all are, you know."

Sara could not stop a soft sigh from passing her lips. "I'm okay, Cath. Really, I am. These nightmares can't hang around forever, and I can't let them run my life or stop it in its tracks while they are around. Hell, I'm probably better off being at work. It gives ,e less time to think about them." That was only half a lie. She was half dreading, half looking forward to going back to the lab. On the one hand she hopefully wouldn't have time to be preoccupied with the horrors, but on the other, she would be back to seeing everything that had caused them in the first place. She loved her job, but these nightmares had been draining her sense of satisfaction from it and replacing it with doubts of whether what they did actually helped anyone in the long run.

She found her arm being held in a vice-like grip as Catherine propelled her towards the door, away from which they'd drifted while they had been talking.

"Come on, or we'll be late," Catherine told her firmly, keeping her strong hold on Sara's arm as they made their way down towards the parking lot. She didn't really think of Sara as the sort to make a run for it, but she wasn't taking any chances. That girl didn't get out enough. Catherine was damned well going to try and make sure that Sara had some fun tonight. Though she hadn't informed Sara of the fact, the entire class tended to get together once the official class was ended and go out somewhere together and socialise. Tonight was a bar night, as luck would have it. Not that she thought getting Sara blind drunk was the best way to get her to relax, but a few drinks probably would get her to loosen up and maybe forget her nightmares for a few hours.

Sara laughed and batted at Catherine's arms, "I can walk on my own, Cath! You don't have to drag me!"

But by this time they were at Catherine's car anyway, and Sara was being herded into the passenger seat. Catherine made sure she was ready before closing the door on her and walking around the other side of the car and hopping into her own seat, twisting the ignition and heading off towards the gym that hosted her classes.

Turning her head slightly to smile at her passenger, Catherine came to the conclusion that she should probably give Sara some information on the people that she was going to be meeting tonight, and hopefully making friends with over the coming weeks. Everyone in the class was rather… unique. They were all lovely, but she didn't want to chuck Sara into the midst of them with absolutely no warning or knowledge of them. She wanted Sara to feel comfortable among them, or she surely wouldn't stick with the class. S

"You want to know some about the girls?" she queried, waiting for Sara's uncertain nod before continuing, "There's only the five – six with you- so it's a fairly small class. But what they lack in number's made up in enthusiasm. The gym's dubbed us the Loony Bin, we end up laughing so much. My girls are… um… exuberant at times."

A spooked look came into Sara's eyes. Catherine was going to stick her in with a group of crazy people? Maybe getting away would be a good idea… was it possible to jump out of a moving vehicle without breaking anything? Would Catherine let her if she tried to jump out, or would she engage the central locking and trap her in? It probably wasn't the best idea, but it was one she might continue to entertain just in case any of the people Catherine told her about sounded truly terrifying and she felt the need to bolt.

"Oh, don't worry, they're not _that_ scary!" Catherine laughed, unable to keep a straight face at the look that had come over Sara's face, "They're not going to try and eat you or anything. They're great women, just not what you'd exactly call typical, and probably not exactly who you'd imagine being in a pole-dancing class. They're fun! They are! _Really!_ Well, you'll see." The look had changed to one of disbelief, and it wasn't budging even with Catherine's assurances.

"Right. So, who are these wonderfully unusual women I'm going to be learning to… dance with?" Sara was resigned to her fate, for now. It was only for an hour after all. She was only giving it a try; if it wasn't her thing, it wasn't as if she was committed or anything. If she wasn't comfortable, well then she would just tell Catherine that and try to find something else that could help her to keep her mind from constantly being on the faces in her nightmares. Maybe Grissom would let her play with his bugs… not that she really liked that idea, but maybe she would once she got to know the creepy-crawlies. It could hardly be any more out there than pole dancing, surely. And here she was, giving _that_ a try.

Catherine considered. How best to describe her girls, without spooking Sara too badly? "Well, there's Joanne. She's the youngest in the group, one of the most enthusiastic people I've ever met. Then there's Mel, the quietest of us… though you may take that position if you stay. She's only a couple years younger than you, in the same boat too; needed a hobby to take her mind off work." In fact, Catherine had been drawing parallels between those two since Sara had agreed to try her class. If Sara was willing to open up a little and let someone near her, she could imagine those two becoming good friends.

Sara but back a sigh of relief. So far, these people didn't sound so horribly intimidating. Unless the three yet to be described her horribly scary, this might not be too bad after all.

Jo and Mel were the two in the class that Catherine knew the least of, which made them the easiest for her to sum up in a few words. From here, it got a little more difficult as she moved on to the members of her class who had been around her for longer, and who she had built up close friendships with.

"Well, Katy's the utterly crazy one in the bunch. She'll do anything, real daredevil sort. Some of the tricks she tries, it's amazing that he hasn't broken anything." Catherine smiled, remembering some of Katy's antics. She was always good for a laugh, though Catherine always had an overwhelming urge to tell her off when she did something stupid. The entire class adored her, but despaired of her ever learning caution. She was 22, older than Jo, but acted younger sometimes, and always had at least one of the other members of the class wincing at what she was attempting, and keeping an eye out for her.

"So that's the one I need to look out for?" Sara pondered, "She's not going to, I don't know… swing around the pole and off it and try to land on her feet after doing a flip or anything is she?" Sara wasn't entirely certain that she was kidding. She didn't understand people who were total daredevils. She was a reasonably cautious person if she had the choice and the time to be and preferred to be able to think things over before entering into them, something she had learned to do after getting in trouble a lot when she was younger. That could work both ways sometimes, but she always felt better about things when she thought them through, and in her time she had managed to talk herself out of doing a fair pile of stuff that would have been ill-advised. She was still wavering as to whether this class should be on that list or not.

"Well, if she tries it, she'll be sorry! She hasn't been doing this for anywhere near long enough to pull anything that fancy off," Catherine replied gaily, the images of Katy trying that being just too funny. She wouldn't put it past the girl to try it either… though not if there was anyone around that she could hurt. Katy was a daredevil, but she didn't drag others into it with her.

"Oh, wonderful," Sara retorted drolly.

"Well anyway," Catherine continued hastily, swerving the topic away from Katy before she really scared Sara, "The last two of our little group are Louisa and Jane. Those two are best friends and well into their fifties, not that they let that slow them down at all. They're a little less energetic than Katy and Jo, but they'll try everything, and work at it til they've got it. They _never_ give up or let the younger ones get ahead of them. I only hope _I'm_ that fit when I'm nearing sixty!"

"Yay, pole-dancing grannies," Sara sighed.

Catherine grinned, "Oh, not quite! Though Louisa's eldest has twins on the way. They're all we ever hear about from her at the moment. As soon as they're born, and she can pry them away from their mother, she's going to bring them in so we can coo over them."

She pulled into a parking space close to the gym, and raised an eyebrow at Sara, "Ready?" she asked, unbuckling her seatbelt and popping the trunk so she could get her gym bag out of it. Sara sighed and popped her own door, trailing after Catherine as she entered the lobby of the gym.

"Well, here we go," she murmured to herself.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, if you've bothered reading this, please take a couple more minutes to review and tell me what you think. You all know where the little blue button is, I'm sure! Click it and write something ;) 


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